I think the following checklist provides a good starting point for critiquing any unit of writing you’re examining:Can it be clearer?Can it be simpl...r?Can it be shorter?If the answer to any of these questions is ‘yes’, then it doesn’t immediately mean the writing is ‘wrong’, or ‘bad’. You can usually make a sentence simpler and shorter by deleting adjectives and adverbs. Often that’s a good call, but not always. It’s just something to think about. I advocate erring on the side of clarity,. They talked long into the night. It was overcast so no moon or stars shone and it got quite dark. The campfire gave an intimate glow and they were serenaded by all the summer insects. Finally, the wine was gone and it was time for slumber.Miriam looked at her guest, “I’ve been working on this in the back of my mind and I’m not going to have you sleep on the floor. You and I both spent years with a companion in bed and know what a nice feeling that is. I guess we just have some nightclothes on.. Slap. I said, “What did I tell you? Who owns who? And what would happen to you when you don’t follow my orders?”She was a little disappointed but then she asked me, “What would happen to me if I disobeyed you, my master? What would be my punishment?” “You dare question me, you slut! I’ll tell you what happens to you when you disobey my orders or question me again.” Saying this I pushed her on the bed so that she lies on her back and then spread her legs wide. She still had her panties at her. Then as the finished amanda and dustin put their clothes back on and grabbed their fishing poles and went to the river to fish like they always do to wait for their passengers to finish up. So the mother with emily and olivia were enjoying the herbivores and taking pictures with them and then the herd was running away from the scene when the mother heard some growls in the distance. Then they walk near tall grass, and the mother walked to see if it was clear through it and she heard the noise.
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